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The Safety Valve in Handling Complaints

2011-01-21

The safety valve in handling not only complaints but people is to allow others to talk themselves out!  They know more about their situation than you do. So ask questions and let them tell you a thing or two. If you disagree, do not interrupt as it is dangerous. They will not listen to you, at all, since they still have their own ideas crying out for expression.  Encourage them to express their ideas fully.
Does this policy pay off in business? You bet!  Carnegie gives an example in which he lost his voice and could not speak during an important meeting. The client's CEO spoke for him, taking his position, and Carnegie just gave smiles and nods. In the end, Carnegie's silence and listening were rewarded after a lively discussion as the company awarded the contract to him. What Carnegie discovered while listening was that he had the incorrect proposition / proposal and would have lost the contract. However, because he was silent while the CEO and staff debated the fine points they talked themselves into the contract. 
Successful people like to reminisce about their safety valve past struggles that made him into the success they are today. Even our friends would rather talk about their achievements rather than listen to others boast. There is an adage by a French philosopher that if you want enemies, excel your friends; if you want friends, let your friends excel you. This is true because when friends excel you they feel important. But when we excel them they feel inferior and envious, at least to some extent.
Mention your achievements only when asked. Let other boast and talk.

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